Clinton forgoes visit to local Greensboro, NC college, citing fear of "Licorice Whips"

Greensboro, NC

Former president Bill Clinton altered the site of his Greensboro, NC rally yesterday amid reports that Penchant Lama was planning to "licorice whip" him.

Clinton, who was scheduled to conduct a democratic rally for his wife Hillary's presidential nomination bid at a local private college, learned of the news yesterday afternoon and moved his rally to the local YMCA.

Penchant Lama, who has dabbled as the second assistant cheerleading coach at the same college Clinton had planned to speak at, recently perfected the "licorice whip," which he learned from Koach Krafty. Krafty developed the whip--which is the act of slapping an opponent across the forearms with extra long Red Vines licorice strands--as a tool in his tennis teaching arsenal.

Read Tinkering to learn about Penchant's arrival and his first adventure in America!

-TsungChi

Penchant practiced the "licorice whip" at his job at the local McDonalds. Each customer that ordered a meat product, which is approximately 94.4% of the customers, (Penchant Lama is a vegetarian) earned a licorice whip across the wrist from Penchant. After whipping 87 customers in a row Penchant was promoted to the postion of "greeter." Management commented on the promotion and released this statement to the public. "We are sorry to those that Penchant whipped, he has been reprimanded and moved to a more suitable job discription. Future meat ordering customers will not be harmed."

Penchant planned to rush the stage at the rally and "licorice whip" Clinton in the ankle. But, prior to the rally, he bragged about his plan to his close friend Stingy Guru, who is one of the leading financial supporters of Senator Clinton's campaign. Stingy immediately contacted the authories and warned his close friend and yoga student, Bill.

Penchant Lama is a stauch supporter of Senator Obama and his bid for the presidential nomination. He had planned to donate a portion ($100.00) of his penny stock fortune to the Obama campaign, but he lost it investing with CNN money man Jim Cramer.

Posted by: Penchant Lama, Inc.