Penchant's Top 10 Worst Christmas Gifts

Greensboro, NC -- Hello everybody. My name is Penchant Lama, and today I'm going to reveal my top 10 worst Christmas gifts. Here's what you really should avoid buying under all cicumstances:

10. A Dyson vacuum cleaner: this gift implies the receiver is a dirty, dirty person.

9. The Zone Diet: this gift implies the receiver is an obese person.

8. A Billy Blanks TaeBow karate video: this gift implies the receiver will suffer a heart attack if they don't start exercising soon.

7. The Moosewood Cookbook: this gift implies the receiver is an animal murderer.

6. Guide to Solitaire book: this gift implies the receiver is a lonely bum with no friends.

5. Channel make-up: this gift implies the receiver is ugly and has skin deformities.

4. Electric nose hair clipper: this gift implies the receiver has slithery nose hair that is distracting in conversation.

3. A gift certificate to Lane Bryant: this gift implies the receiver is larger and more robust than necessary for sustained health and well being.

2. An Acorn Stairlifter: this gift is expensive, and implies the receiver is infirm and incapable of climbing.

1. A one-way ticket to Baghdad: this gift also is expensive, and implies that you never want to see the receiver again.

Merry Christmas.
Love, Penchant